Our African Princess

Our little Tihun just had her second visit to the hospital. This time for just an outpatient procedure (colonoscopy), but the hospital nonetheless. This 3 year old has been through a lot of medical ordeals since arriving in the U.S., none of which she would have endured in Ethiopia. On one hand, this is a blessing. Coming to the States has possibly saved her life because she wouldn't have had access to such great medical care in Ethiopia. So we are thankful. But it is also overwhelming to watch your little girl be poked and prodded on such a regular basis. We are sad for her.

Another convoluted situation is her response to all of this invasive care. She has no fear. The first time she was immunized, she calmly handed her arm to the nurses and blankly watched as they repeatedly pricked her. She endured multiple (seemingly painful) attempts at drawing her blood without a flinch. Meanwhile, Solomon needed a whole team of medical professionals to hold him down. The doctor was worried about me when he freaked out so bad on his first visit, but I was fine. That is the normal response of a child being held down and hurt. But when Tihun complied without any acknowledgment of the pain, I starting weeping. That is not normal--it should upset her at least a little.

There are also positives to this, of course. We are constantly in awe of how strong this child is. I never get any resistance to the things we have to do for her health...nebulizer treatments, stool samples, ANOTHER trip to a doctor... She had to fast for her colonoscopy and drink a LOT of laxative in a short period of time. No complaints. No whining at the incessant bowel movements. Can anyone name a 3 year old that would respond in a like manner?? Unbelievable. To top it off, when it came time for the enema (I know, too much information), she listened to the explanation of what was about to happen and immediately complied. And what followed was one of my favorite moments with Tihun (seriously, after an enema?)! We laughed. We giggled and laughed so hard that we were crying--all while she was sitting on the toilet losing every bit of substance in her body. But we laughed.

Sorry for the graphic image, but I can't help sharing how amazing this little human being is. And this description of her medical self is true of her personality in general. She takes everything in stride. Nothing phases this girl. She has been exposed to innumerable new things, and she experiences them as though she has seen them before. She is so confident and eager. I have to be honest that when I pictured adopting a 3 year old, I imagined one response: panic. We have a child who was removed from everything she knows (except her younger brother, which is a significant continuity), and plopped into a new family and environment and culture. Surely this child is going to panic, and panic often! But, no. Tihun has shocked us with her laid-back, confident, trusting personality. Who is this little person? I think I will spend my whole life trying to answer that question.

Watching Tihun navigate through all of these issues makes us reflective about her past. What has this little girl been through? What kind of pain has she endured? How much love and joy must she have experienced to possess such confidence now? She had over 3 years of life that we know nothing about. It is mind-boggling to not know every detail about your child's life.

Yet again, the other side of the coin--we are thankful for her life before we knew her. It shaped her into an amazing child. It formed beautiful qualities in her that we would have never been able to create. God has shaped and is shaping Tihun into an inspiring person, and we will never foolishly take credit for that. We will just give thanks.


* In the event that you think our Tihun is perfect, let me reassure that she is not. (She threw a tantrum just after I wrote this post.) I am just highlighting some wonderful things about her and choosing to leave out some of the not-so-wonderful ones. :)

Halloween

I'm not sure if anyone even reads this blog anymore...after a 2 month plus hiatus. This blog is so stagnant that there are these random spam businesses leaving creepy comments on old posts. Yuk. (Let me know if you know how to get rid of these bugs.) It's not that we aren't doing fun things worth writing--we are--it's just that I can't bring myself to look at the computer at the end of a tiring day. I'm happy to report that we are surviving with 4 kids and even enjoying a "normal" sort of family life much quicker than I had imagined. I think we look and act like a family that has been together for a long time--not just 4 short months. Yet I am most certainly off-duty by bedtime and in great need of relaxation. And, sorry folks, blogging is not on my list of relaxing things to do. :) Maybe I should just cave and join Facebook. It would probably fit with my schedule a little better... So, once again, I'm not going to attempt to play catch-up from the last couple months. I'll just try to get back on board with the latest events...
Halloween is fun in our neighborhood. People really get into it. There was even a vampire opera on a stage in the middle of the street--they lost their teeth from eating too much candy :) I love the day-of, but never seem to get around to the costume-planning frenzy. We just lay out all of the dress-up clothes we have before each event and try to be creative. We did our cutesy costumes on Saturday (pictured above) for the festival in our park. My personal favorite is Adaline's flower--completely made up and pieced together. Dad said she looked more like Lady Gaga.
We decided to go with scary costumes for the main event. It all started with Adaline wanting to be a princess vampire. She looked really nasty, I must say. (I should add a close-up of her.) Tihun wanted to be a flower girl, but I convinced her to be a flower girl-turned-witch by slipping some black on top of her frilly dress. Solomon had to ride on Dad, and we used lollipops to keep him happy. He had several before the night was over. Our friend Ben carried Solomon later and used him to get more candy. One of the benefits of having 4 kids--4 times the candy!
Speaking of candy, we have trained our kids for years to always pick chocolate when given a choice. Before we leave, we drill them. "Laffy Taffy vs. Mr. Goodbar, which do you choose? Quick!" It was easier this year because the older kids can read. So we told them our personal favorites to look out for--mine: Snickers, Jamison: Reese's. And our training worked! They were happy to report when they found the last Reese's in the big bowl of Jaw Breakers and Jolly Ranchers. Arthur actually told one woman "no, thank you, I would prefer not to have Laffy Taffy..." and she gave him something else (ouch! maybe we took it a little too far?)

The only problem with this plan is that the kids didn't realize that WE were going to eat all of that sought-after chocolate. Arthur tried to find a Reese's THE NEXT DAY and couldn't find one because Jamison had eaten all of them (and I ate all of the other good stuff). He was so upset that he went to all of that trouble to get yummy candy and his parents ate everything but the gross stuff that we drilled them to leave behind. Oops. That's the problem with them getting older and smarter. We can't fool them like we used to. So now I've promised Arthur that I will buy him a Reese's because he's never tasted one and he'd like to know what the fuss is all about. Doesn't that defeat the purpose of going trick-or-treating? Now I have to buy my own candy because I am such a selfish sugar-craving mom? Oh well...I do receive some payback for my wrongdoing. Every evening (including this one) I feel lousy because I've overdosed on sugar and high fructose corn syrup. My kids are limited to one candy per day, but their mother has a different system for consuming the loot. Eat until sick.

And while we're on the topic of sicknesses...the most difficult part of having 4 kids so far has been the vast number of illnesses. At any given time, there is at least one child with a fever or a cough or vomiting or wheezing (Tihun and Solomon have pretty severe asthma). It's hard to take care of one sick child when you have 3 healthy ones bouncing off the walls. I feel like a nurse--giving nebulizer treatments to 2 kids, staying 48 hours in the hospital with Tihun...and a sanitation employee--cleaning up diarrhea, vomit, accidents...it almost feels weird when they are all healthy, but it never lasts for more than a day or two. But I am thankful that the worst of this transition is just a physical one. I can imagine much more difficult problems with going from 2 to 4. We are alive and well...but coming off of a sugar high at the moment :)

The Farm and Woodstock

We recently took a day trip to Stone Barns Farm in NY an hour outside of the city. Friends of ours are cooks there, so we were able to get an insider tour while the place was closed on Monday. It was a lovely day seeing the animal and vegetable/fruit farm. Then our friends prepared us an amazing lunch and we ate on the terrace of the fancy restaurant (that was closed). The view was spectacular. (Pictured are the kids' letter t-shirts made by my friend. You can't see them all, but each shirt starts with the first letter of the name of the kid wearing it. In case we get confused. They are super cute walking around in matching outfits!)

All of the kids loved the tomato house. They all ate dozens of tomatoes off the vine. Yummy!

Tihun worked really hard to catch a chicken. I finally grabbed one so that they could pet it. She was so upset when we left the chicken coops. We finally figured out that she thought we were catching it to cook and eat it. Oops. Communication breakdown.

The Berkshire pigs were enormous and stinky. The restaurant slaughters and eats 3 pigs/week.

Again, we are so thankful for friends! Some friends of ours have a house in Woodstock, NY, and they let us stay there for 3 nights this week. It was rainy and chilly, but still great to get out of the city for a longer amount of time. Lots of mud playing!

We ate outside when we could--even when it drizzled on us. The place was so beautiful!

Fun Stuff

Front row seats at orchestra in the park

Quadracyling on Governor's Island

Overlooking Brooklyn Bridge from Gov Island

Sculpture climbing on Gov Island

A & A camping trip with Dad and friends

Hiking and wild blueberry picking with friends

Little Solomon skipped many naps to have all of this fun! (Mommy is very annoyed with blogger right now. I can't get pictures to do what I want. I have many more to post, but I'm tired of waiting/failed attempts. Maybe more later...)

Oochee

What is it about being outside? Is there some magic in the air? I have spent a lot of effort trying to keep our family at home--bonding, resting, renewing...this is what you are "supposed" to do when you adopt children. Create a safe and structured environment. Make sure that they know that you are their forever parents (and forever siblings). Reassure them that this is it--no more huge changes or moves. This worked for about a week or so in our home. Now, staying indoors usually results in grumpy, fighty frustration. I'm amazed at how walking outside can change everything. Constant arguing and whining can just melt away when you cross the threshold. Enemies (a.k.a. siblings) become best friends. Stressed parents become patient and playful. It really is magic.

This has been true of the Galt family thus far, and Tihun and Solomon are following suit. Solomon grabs his shoes constantly begging to go outside. He points at the window and makes his little "I want it" grunt. Tihun begins at 7 o'clock in the morning asking when we can go "chow" (goodbye) or "oochee" (outside). Our days are 100% better if we make it outside. The problem is that I don't have a lot of options in this stage of life. Four kids are difficult to manage in most environments, it's so hot that we can hardly breathe, Solomon takes 2 naps...but I've found a few things that work for us. Splash pools and sprinklers are our friends.

So far my favorite outside adventure with the kids (with other adults) has been the beach. We have gone twice (day trips) with the kids and were surprised at how well it went. Adaline and Arthur LOVE the waves. Tihun enjoys the sand and was impressed by the "telik woo ha" (big water). Solomon dives into either water or sand--literally DIVES.

I'm so happy that our whole family loves to be outside. Why fester inside when you can blister outside?



*That is Arthur's head at the top of the wave in the last picture. The waves were intense and they didn't mind being knocked around a bit.

One Family

In one sense, Tihun and Solomon have joined a new family. They have lost their birth family, their birth country and culture, and everything they know, and they have become part of something new. This is simultaneously tragic and beautiful. Nevertheless, it is their story, and our family has chosen to become a part of their story. Our family is blessed to have them in our lives.


In another sense, we are happy to be able to keep them in the same family in which they were raised. Both Tihun and Solomon were baptized as Christians in the Ethiopian Orthodox Church a few days after they were born. Last Sunday, we were able to take vows before our church to promise to uphold their baptismal vows. We did not know them when they joined God's family, but it brings me joy that we are able to keep them in the same family. It's only one continuity in their transitional little lives, but it's the most important thing that I can think of to stay the same.

I can't show you too many pictures of the ceremony because I was weeping pretty quickly into it (which is not pretty). I didn't realize that we were taking vows, and certainly hadn't read them, so I was taking it in as they were being asked. Our pastor asked the simple question, "Do you take these children to be your own?" and I responded with a weeping yelp. Very embarrassing, but I am thankful for the emotional experience. It was good to stand in front of so many people, promising to love Tihun and Solomon and raise them as part of God's family. I felt the weight and joy of it, and let it all loose in front of hundreds of people :)

That evening we celebrated at an Ethiopian restaurant. Tihun was ecstatic. She ate a ton and ruined the beautiful Ethiopian dress I bought for her baptism (before I knew she had already been baptized). She also enjoyed speaking Amharic to the wait staff who were very sweet and kind. It was a special celebration!

New Creations

There's no way to adequately catch up on recent events in our family. A month ago we met and took custody of 2 beautiful children, Tihun and Solomon. We raised them for a week in Ethiopia, made a 24-hour trek to America, and introduced them to their brother and sister and home. They have experienced innumerable "firsts" and transitioned beautifully to our family. I can't begin to tap into the experiences we and they have had, especially in the limited time budget that I have these days raising 4 kids :) I can only reflect for a moment now and try to blog about life as it comes from here forward. Maybe one day I can go back and reflect on the trip to Ethiopia and the 1st month of life with our new children.

Tihun and Solomon have experienced so many new things since we have met them--first bath tub, first car seat (not a fan of the buckles), first stroller (thankfully big fans), first restaurant, first playground, first pool, first fireworks, many new foods...but perhaps the most poignant is the addition of a new brother and sister. Every other experience is just that, an experience. It comes and goes and they learn something new. But these new sibling relationships are constant and dynamic, both amazing and difficult. Tihun and Solomon are having the easier transition in this area, perhaps because they have had dozens of "siblings" to live with in various orphanages. Their worlds have certainly been turned upside down by moving and joining our family, but in this area, the twins' world is being transformed in a more dramatic way. Tihun and Solomon are not used to the attention of a mom and a dad. Arthur and Adaline are not used to sharing the attentions of their parents. Tihun is very independent and has had to navigate through relationships with all sorts of kids. Adaline and Arthur have had the house to themselves for almost 6 years.

It has been a huge stretch for A & A, and often quite difficult, but it has also been the cause of delightful new creations. Adaline is especially attaching to Solomon, even though she has rarely been interested in babies. We are now hearing a new voice and a new giggle that Adaline uses with her brother. She uses a tone when she speaks to him that we have never heard before. And she has a joy and laughter when she plays with him that is foreign and new. This relationship has created something all-together new and glorious. Arthur has never had a sister who needs and wants his help. He walks around with the Amharic translation book and works on phrases that allow him to communicate with her. In fact, our whole family is using dozens of new words all day long--not just when we speak to Tihun, but even with each other. We are creating a new Galt family "language," without even intending to do so. A & A interact differently on the playground now--instead of just playing, they are often pushing a brother or sister on the swings or introducing them to a new piece of equipment. New behaviors and patterns are being formed as a natural result of Tihun and Solomon joining our family.

New relationships and periods of transition produce growth that is full of friction and toil. We are certainly feeling the growing pains around here and are quite tired! But we are also witnessing new creations--new laughs, new roles, new voices--and we are thankful for these two wonderful creatures who are wildly blessing our family.

Student of the Month

We received shocking news last week. Arthur was selected "student of the month" from his class. We were surprised because he has not proven to be the model student--I probably shouldn't elaborate, but let's just say we were surprised. Adaline has been in much less trouble at school this year, so we were surprised that he was selected and not her. Nevertheless, we could not have been more happy about this news. Arthur definitely struggles with insecurity (and it gets worse when his sister is praised), so this was a huge boost for his tender heart. To be honest, the award is no big deal, but our family made a big deal about it to make him feel special. (As a side note, Adaline naturally was so proud of her brother and didn't show an ounce of jealousy. She sang "student of the month" all week and was so happy for him. She is so sweet to her brother!) We told him that we could celebrate in any way that he wanted. His initial idea to have 2 friends over was canceled, so we told him that he could have any meal that he wanted that night for dinner...any restaurant, any home-cooked meal, anything. He thought for a few minutes and came up with this: "Bread. Dipped in oil, with some butter. And broccoli." Later he added sausage and deleted the broccoli. I thought, really? That's all you can come up with? But our little boy loves bread (nice crusty bread) and he loves to give it a "bath" in some nice olive oil with herbs and spices. He was so happy and we had a great celebration together. Here are pictures of the award ceremony. (Oh, and we already got the heads-up that Adaline is in line for student of the month for next month. The teacher alternates girls and boys, so Arthur providentially got it first.)

Here is a catch-up on happenings in May:

My birthday request: camping. We decided to stay in a cabin for the first time because rain was predicted. It turned out to be a good choice. It rained all night.














Spring Fling fundraiser at the school complete with face-painting:















Last art class at Pratt:

Field trip

We had a hot field trip to the aquarium yesterday. Waiting for the sea lion show was brutal, so we passed the time taking pictures. Field trips are always an adventure! Our kids' school is a uniform school, but for some reason on field trip days, they get to wear play clothes. That way they blend in with all of the other kids so that we can lose them constantly. I never looked at one animal--just kept my eyes busy looking for stray children. We were so hot and tired (especially after our stuffy bus trip home), so we decided to play in the playground sprinklers afterward. Very refreshing!

Also, we booked our plane tickets last night. We are going to Ethiopia June 2-14!!

2 weeks!!

Hopefully we leave for Ethiopia in 2 weeks. We can't wait! We are still waiting for our visa interview to be confirmed by the US Embassy so we haven't booked airline tickets. We have learned more about our kids this week. The first being that Solomon is walking! I know that developing well is a good thing, but I have to say that I was sad when I heard the news. I would have loved to see the first steps. Tihun has been described as smiley, not shy, sweet, and friendly. She also likes to draw and is still posing for the camera. Oh, and she doesn't like trains--all girl, they said. Solomon, on the other hand, has been described as "serious" by more than one person. And he is reported to be "all boy" and we were told to get ready. Lord, have mercy on us.

Presenting...

the newest members of the Galt family

Tihun and Solomon


We can't wait to meet you!!

(we passed court and are hoping to travel to pick them up in early June)

Waiting

We are eagerly waiting for the newest Galt arrivals. Our first court date was postponed, so we await court date #2. The only news we hear of our future kids is from other parents who have traveled before us. We have given permission to 2 families (working on 3) to take pictures/video of our kids. It is very exciting to receive these snippets into our kids' lives.

The first set of pictures (and a bonus video) consisted of our daughter hugging and kissing (practically tackling) her little brother. Her personality felt all too familiar (Adaline #2--look out!) and he was very chill. It was sweet to see her affection for her brother and relieving to see his apparent laid-back nature (don't we deserve #4 to be a little calmer than our current experience?).

We recently received the 2nd set of pictures, and they were not so enlightening. Our son is crying in his crib and our daughter is grimacing at the camera. Clearly it was not good timing for them. I still enjoy these pictures because I've never seen my son cry and I've never seen my daughter frown. It is still a glimpse into their lives. Plus, I'm a mom and I am aware that kids cry and kids don't always like to smile at a camera. It's not personal, right?

I was very excited to show these new pictures to Adaline and Arthur when they came home from school. I flipped open the computer and began with the zoomed-in shot of their brother crying. I watched Arthur closely as he is often quiet and thoughtful when he sees his siblings. I watched as his eyes began to water and he had the look of utter concern. Then I looked at Adaline and saw her wiping the tears from her face. Whoa. It was one of the sweetest things I've ever seen.

They were very solemn throughout the entire slide show. They didn't know what to do with the thought of their brother and sister being sad. Adaline wondered if he was crying because he wanted his brother and sister. Later Jamison asked her why she cried when she doesn't even know him yet. She quickly corrected him and said, "We know him. He's ______ (his name)."

It is an amazing ride to bond with these kids from afar. To wait for them, yet still go on with normal life. To wonder what the wait is like for them (they don't even know about us yet and won't until we pass court). Clearly Adaline and Arthur already feel a connection to their brother and sister--even though they haven't met them. They specifically prayed for them for months, and they "know" them because God has specifically given them to us. We cannot wait to see the many blessings they will bring to our family!
*Bonus pictures: Easter celebration. We had 20 people gathered around long tables in our living room. Very fun!